Waiting sucks. It’s not any fun at all. We have this idea of something that is coming – something we know we’re going to be a part of we believe is going to be great – but it’s not time yet. So what do we do? How do we not lose hope in the waiting?
Blindspots, flashlights, and doing hard things
Blindspots lay in the background and continue to grow and grow and grow until they suffocate the light. To get rid of them, we need a friend with a flashlight who can sit with us and shine a light on those dark places. It’s time to stop letting the darkness win and start getting to the fullness of who we were created to be.
I know what I want to be when I grow up
Growing up, I was always told I could be anything I want to be. Everyone said to work hard and you can be anything you want to be. At 33, I think I’ve finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up.
The story of a fat kid; or how you are what you think you are
Growing up I was always big. When I signed up to play football in seventh grade, I had to get a physical before practice started. At the age of 11, I started the season at 5’8 and 168 pounds. By the end of the season I’d gain an inch and 12 pounds. I don’t know why I remember that. When I started high school two years later I was six feet tall and over 200 pounds. I also wore a size 13 shoe. I wasn’t a fat kid. I was a big kid. The problem was I thought I was fat. Because I’d always been called “big guy” or other versions of that, I took it as “fat guy” even though no one ever called me fat. This was just my own personal insecurity. While other people saw big, I saw fat. I started gaining weight the summer before my…
On teenagers, depression, and growing up; or five ways the Church can help prevent teenage suicide
Has your best friend ever looked you in the eye and told you you’re “just so G– damned depressed all the time”? Has your grandma ever looked at you and said she was worried about you because you weren’t smiling? Have your friends ever stopped inviting you to things because you simply weren’t any fun to be around anymore? Those things all happened to me within a three month span my first year of seminary. A few months earlier, over the course of a weekend, I lost the job I loved, got dumped by the girl I loved, and got in an ATV wreck where I flipped over the handlebars without a helmet. Oh, and I was starting grad school working in a program that I ended up hating. It wasn’t a fun time. The whole thing led to a downward spiral of depression. The only thing is I didn’t…
So you got fired. Now what?
I’m less than a decade into the full time work force, but one thing I’ve learned is this: At some point, you’re probably going to get fired. Getting fired comes in many different ways. Often times you get called into an office and walk out with no job. Other times your job is changed multiple times to try and force you to quit. Some call that coaching you out the door. There’s also the forced early retirement, lay off, and “change in job description but we’ll keep you around until you find something else” long break up. No matter the clothes it wears, it always ends up with you not having the job you used to have. The number of my friends who have been fired in the past few years is both amazing and sad. Some have deserved it. Others got screwed. In most cases,…
The best gift you can get your wife this Valentine’s Day
I’m not even going to beat around the bush with this one. I won’t even make some lofty statement to try to intrigue you to read the rest of this post. I’ll go ahead and tell you the answer: Learn her love language. Seriously. It’s that simple. If you learn your wife’s love language you unlock the key to a mystery centuries of guys wish they could’ve decoded. If you know about love languages, you’re all set. You can skip the next part and pick back up at the “additional resources” part at the bottom. If you don’t know about love languages, keep reading. When I was in seminary, one of my professors introduced me to the idea of love languages. I had no clue what they were much less how to use them. I found it weird we were in a class…
The six word prayer every dad should pray every day
I’m a jerk. Ask anyone who knows me and most of them will have a story of how I’ve been a jerk to them and had to later come back and apologize for it. It’s not something I’m proud of. I work really hard to not be a jerk but inevitably I slip up and do something to remind myself (and everyone else) that I am, in fact, a jerk. As I’ve grown up and become more self aware, I’ve learned that at the core of my jerk-ness is a very high level of self absorption. I like to do what I want. When I want. How I want. Don’t get me wrong, I can be selfless and put others before myself, but only when I want to and in ways I want to. That personality trait isn’t great when you’re single, but…
How one word can change the way you view other people
One of the things I’m most grateful for in life is that my parents raised me to appreciate people. My dad was almost militant in making sure I said please and thank you not only to my elders, but everyone I came in contact with. It annoyed me then but I’m thankful for it now. As I’ve grown up, I’ve always tried to make it a point to look people in the eye and say thank you. The baggage kid at the grocery store. The bank teller. The fast food employee. I always want them to know I’m grateful for their small role in the conveniences of my life. As part of that, my go to phrase as I’m leaving those interactions is “hey I appreciate it. Have a great day!” I started seeing them as more than the cashier at the gas station and the waitress at my favorite restaurant. They…
A letter to my hair (before it leaves me forever)
Dear Hair, I always knew it would come to this. Since I was young, I looked at my dad and his dad and knew one day we would have to say goodbye to each other. Thankfully that moment isn’t here quite yet, but I thought it’d be good for us to both prepare for it in advance. I’m now 30 and have two kids so your departure is imminent. I don’t want you to go. Please oh please know I want you to stay forever. But I understand if you have to leave. So for as long as we’re together, I promise to treat you the best I can. I’m terribly sorry for some of the things I did to you in the past. I had no clue at the time that a bowl cut looked as horrible as it did. Had I know that parting you down the middle…